Saturday, June 26, 2010

Facing Fears

Part of the process of getting ready for this surgery is learning from others who have had this surgery. I have posted 5 fabulous bandit blogs on my list that I am currently reading that have been insightful and fun and helpful. All of these ladies have amazing stories and authentic voices. I am looking forward to learning from all of these women and following in their footsteps. Thanks for sharing, ladies!!!

Hubby recently confessed one of his fears regarding the surgery-considering how steadfastly supportive he's been-I was surprised. Here it is: that I will stop cooking and that he and the boys will be on their own! And honestly-I can't even predict how I will handle that. Currently, I love being in charge of feeding my family. I enjoy the process of planning, shopping, preparing, and serving the food (hate clean up!). And my youngest son loves my cooking!!! His compliments are so important to me... So, we'll see...

Currently my greatest fear is losing my relationship with food. Both privately and publicly. Because I am an emotional eater, food soothes my boredom, frustration, anxiety...you name it. Food is also my joy-the way I interact with friends-my reward. And because I am grappling with the notion of losing this "best friend,"
every meal has become The Last Supper-as if I were a condemned man at dawn! So yes, the eating is out of control-a voracious monster on the march. But not for long... I am saying my good-byes to soda this week. Monday will be another baby step and I will add another good-bye to the list... Will keep you posted.

Overall I am feeling empowered and resolved. Maybe This Time...!!!

4 comments:

  1. Thanks for following me! You are going to do great with your band, I had my surgery in October last year and I've lost 50 lbs (I am a slow loser!!) But I can honestly say that I don't really cook that much different than I did before. Your portions will change but for the most part you should be able to eat everything you do now. I would tell the hubby not to worry about that. There are some things you will want to avoid and everyone's list is different (which stinks) but I completely understand about cooking and feeding people and finding joy in that. I express love through food, eat emotions and all that good stuff too. I still fight with the eating when bored, eating when stressed issue and honestly I think I always will. Now I just eat less during those times. Also I was a diet coke girl, big time. I gave them up completely for my surgery and now I have maybe 1 a week. I got a large diet coke from Sonic the other day and it took me all day to drink it. I used to slam on of those things in 5 minutes. It won't be as hard to give up as you think. My go to beverage is Crystal Light. Oh and one more thing...go ahead and take some before pictures and measurements now. You will want them later, especially when you plateau and want to look at something to show you the changes your body is going through. Glad to see another southern girl in blogland!! Welcome

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  2. thanks for the support and suggestions, southern belle! i will be checking in with you frequently!!!

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  3. Have been sent by Linda. Just read through your blog, love the entry about the nutritionist story!
    I'm in England, I was banded in March and have lost 25 lb's so far.
    Good luck!

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  4. Hi there!! Your DH is a smart man. It's hard to explain but I'll try. I love food as much as I did before. I love cooking as much as I did before. Actually, it's more exciting because I'm always trying new recipes (found on the blogs.) BUT.... When I go to the trouble of making a meal and I can only eat 2 bites, (stuck) the little bratty snot in me says "well, FINE...just forget it" and I proceed to starve my husband for the next week. My girls could really care less because they really dislike new recipes, but they are annoyed when I don't like to eat at the table with everyone. When you are stuck on something or when they are pigging out on a past favorite food - for me (and the food addict in me) I have to be AWAY from them and doing something else to distract me. I walk, I read, I blog, I shop online. Anything to take me away from that dinner time. It is something to think about - it has affected my family life...but it's nothing that would ever have made me NOT get the band - even if I had known it ahead of time.
    Good luck - I already love your blog!

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